The good with the bad (dreams)

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night from a horrible dream that suddenly got you to worry your heart out? 

I had a terrible dream the other night, one that is reoccurring and always seems to come in times of stress. I was wide awake in horror BUT THEN remembered that YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR MIND (not the other way around). So there was this sudden burst of energy and I started writing... a sort of poem if you will:

I guess bad dreams 

are just efficient ways of showing us that we care 

or to make us aware that we are human and have fears

To remind us

that there are things we can't control 

in other ways than how we handle it

To bring awareness

to our subconscious mind

To test us

To prepare us

To make us stronger

To have faith

in the world to continue those pirouettes

and darkness to break into day

To know

that the universe got our backs (even literally)

To prove to us

of the impact 

of images and imagination

To remind us of the intelligent thought sorting system that is 

the state of sleep and dream

To train our ability to interpret

or let go

A bad dream always ends

and where do you go then?

Back to your life

which you actually to a large extent can control

There's a brand new day ahead of you

and that's real

That's something to wake up to

A decent human being.

The beginning of this post was hardest to write yet. 

Erased and replaced so many times. 

I prefer not to get political but considering circumstances the subject seems inevitable.

- - - - - - - -

When I was ten we had a pretend election in school. We got to vote for the president of USA and we got to choose between George W. Bush and Al Gore. I voted for Bush.

I had no idea what he stood for but his name was Bush and I thought it was funny. Imagine, a Bush for president in The States. And he won our pretend election. And the real one too.

I'd like to think that the voters of that election (2000) and this one (2016) did not vote out of the same grounds as I did as a ten-year-old. Because "it was funny." 

Because it's not.

Granted, Donald Trump may be different from conventional politicians, but is it really the force for change that USA needs? For a moment I felt the same kind of dread as was felt when Sweden Democrats entered parliament and then later became the third largest party in the Swedish Parliament. 

- - - - - - - -

We must not get infuriated or think that the ones with a opinion differing from ours are stupid. They have their reasons. Wether it is change, economy, personal gain, immigration politics, a sense of rebellion or because of not letting the family voting traditions down is of little importance to me. 

What I want to talk about today is a quality which is not valued very high in our society or amongst the people with power. A quality which any decent human being has. The quality which makes us help each other (be they close ones or strangers), bridge the gaps of fear or ignorance and replace it with understanding and acceptance. This quality is one that heals, builds and brings hope for humanity. 

I'm talking about compassion. 

And should not the people with power first and foremost be decent human beings? 

Why is compassion seemingly valued so little today? So far I have not seen any compassion from Donald Trump and this is one of the strongest reasons why I believe he will not make any wise decisions.

I refuse to think all hope is lost. Of course I am worried for a country which can elect someone who may base their decisions on the values opposing compassion. Someone who does not believe in climate change (as if it was some sort of conspiracy?) but acts out personal gain, out of fear or hate or judgement. A swelling ego without an open mind. 

It's a beautiful day. 

The sun is turning the early snow into subtle glitter and the sky is unapologetically blue.

I refuse to  surrender to fear or hopelessness.

There are decent human beings out there and we must strive to be part of them.

We must grow and nurture our compassion. It must not be mistaken for weakness. Because it can feel disempowering when we see only the problem and no given solution. It is actually a strength and the pain we feel when we can't help is just a pinpoint we're heading down the right path. 

I'd even go as far as to say compassion is a superhero strength. 

It can make us do incredible things. 

Believe in it.

Believe you have the power.

Don't fall into the trap of waiting for the hero.

Because it is you.

And if you need someone to pick you 

and tell you that you are the chosen one 

THEN I PICK YOU NOW

and if you feel unprepared for the task know that all heroes felt like that.

Your life has prepared you and will continue to do so

challenging you with opportunities for growth.

All change in the world starts with you.

If you want peace.

Find it within yourself first. 

Then show it to the world and help it feel it too.

If you don't know where to start there are a great deal of Ted Talks on the subject of compassion and empathy. Get inspired. Get empowered. Shake the world in a gentle way. 

Off to the yoga mat.

PEACE IN.

The challenge of the ZZZs

So if you're like me and go into energy save during the winter... well you can avoid total hibernation!
Here's a few good tricks to keep your energy up and help you stay on track:

Join challenges
No matter what your practise is it's always good to join a challenge and motivate yourself by keeping the day count and just sticking to it. I'm currently doing the Yoga Camp challenge with yoga with Adriene. A Hatha yoga experience, and this one has a bit more elements of mental wellness than her previous "30 days of yoga" challenge (which I also highly recommend!)

Get by with a little help from your friends

When it gets tough it might feel like a failure (IT IS NEVER) to ask your friends for help. Actually it is a very strong thing to do and when your friends know where you're at and what's going on it will be much easier for them to help you. We don't have to be so goddamned independent all the time! So ask for advice, ask for support, ask for a bit of cheerleading or gentle reminders. Or better yet... why not join a challenge together?

Seize the day

Carpe diem might sound like a massive cliché, yet as the days become shorter it becomes all the more important to get outside and gather as much sun as you can. Even when it's cloudy it's still brighter outside than indoors. Also the fresh air will do you good. In our family the outdoor minimum limit is at least 30 minutes per day, something I am grateful for today.

Recharge

During the wintertime it's easy to be *yawn* a chronic sleepy head. So one way to go about it is of course to sleep more. This however does not work for me, in fact it makes me more sleepy. A bunch of other options might be

Cold showers. Yep you heard me. A brilliant way to wake the body up and although it might not feel too inviting on cold days it actually gets your circulation up and you will be less cold afterwards. I've written a little more about hydrotherapy in a previous post.

Power naps. If you're feeling sleepy, set your alarm and give yourself a good powernap. I usually feel better and more alert if I'm surrendering to a couple of zzz rather than forcing myself to stay awake.

Keep doing what energises you! When winter comes (and it will, as Snow so eagerly points out) it might be tempting to cancel everything and stay under a blanket. I advice you not to. By keep going you will let your body (and brain) know who's the boss. And by doing what you set out to do you will get a kick of "YES I DID IT" and coming home afterwards to a cup of tea and the blanket will be all the more rewarding.

Play. Ok, I'm sure some of you are feeling a bit of resistance with thoughts of playing being just for kids but I assure you that getting your sillies and giggles up will boost you in so many ways. So invest time and energy in having fun, because it will give so much back.

- - - - - - - -

When it's evening, weekend or you just feel like watching something there's a brilliant korean film I saw yesterday. It was both visually and emotionally beautiful as well as fun and the right kind of weird (for me atleast.) 

Kimssi Pyoryugi (2009)

in english known as The castaway on the moon.

That's all I had for now, but I'm sure you will find your way to power up during the winter. 

Get out there. 

Do good. 

Reward yourself. 

And see you later!

The lost sparks.

The conversations I have with my oldest sister. They're incredibly inspiring but at times tough. She always seems to say what I need to hear. The resistance I feel usually means that there's some truth in the remark. At times the sudden bright light can hurt the eyes, but eventually they adjust.

We have been discussing gender a lot. It's a topic that really gets me fired up at times. Heart pounding anger, bitterness and sadness for the injustice that is and has been. Thankfully meditation and yoga helps me to step away and view it from some distance. I think some of my bitterness is my own creation. The belief that I somehow would be limited by what society identifies me as. We created society, who should have the power but us? I am part of the society. I am one of the labellers. The more I open up to the fact that everything has more than one side and more than one truth the less limited I feel. The sex doesn't matter. The skin doesn't matter. The length or width of our bodies don't matter. The symmetry of your face is no matter.

What matters is ignorance. The knowledge that's somehow lost because of faulty education. The traditional echoes of the past are there most of the time not because people are idiots or intentionally mean, but because they just don't know better. We might think the teachers are our teachers but truth is we learn from the ones who raise us and we inherit their thoughts and beliefs to a large extent. We can change our minds, but not without first being aware of our "recorded" messages, that we're just repeating. We need to separate our own thoughts from things we've just picked up from others. We're often thinking of humans as intellectual. Sometimes I think that's our greatest flaw because it even makes us stupid as we tend to complicate things for ourselves.

What really matters is that we're not happy. Sometimes because we're victimizing ourselves and others. We're trying to change "us" or "them" with force instead of understanding and accepting. I'd like to simply emphasise our need to wake up and see the real issues. Don't get me wrong, I still want to fight the injustice and I still want equality, but I don't feel it's doing anyone good to be in constant fight mode. Sure it's energizing sometimes to just pour out your oh so important opinion but carrying anger is harmful in the long run. I'm asking myself what good has the rage brought onto the face of feminism? Don't waste your breath on angry monolgues for closed minds and ears. Pick your fights. Pick the ones that truly matter. If you feel that something is missing then find it! Something I missed in my childhood was a hero. Someone who I could look up to. I didn't think there was any woman out there to inspire me to greatness beyond appearance. I was too focussed on how little women were mentioned in history to see the ones that actually stood out despite everything. Now that my eyes are searching they seem to be everywhere. They're brilliant and they're filling me with hope... For the future generations. Not because women and men will be equal, but because they already are and we still have the chance to understand it. To lay down our swords and embrace eachother as the same. We're all from the same place and heading the same direction.

One of my greatest teachers, whom I've for a long time not accepted as a teacher (here it goes with the resistance again...) taught me my greatest lesson so far. We are creators. Of ourselves, our reality and the ripples of the universe around us. Even though little grains of sand can make rings on the surface we need to look beyond it. Beyond the labels. Beyond what eyes can see.

I saw a photo from a time where I was not yet on this earth. You both had a spark in your eyes. I saw another photo where I was in the picture and your spark was nolonger there. At first it made me sad, but now I'd like to think it wasn't lost. I'd like to think that me and my sisters are the same sparks in physical form. Born into this world from love, from passion and from the ultimate power of creativity. It is my honor to be a spark.  

The winner & perfect mindset.

To succeed one has to have the right set of mind. Just like the Swedish ord "lagom", which means "just right" your perfect mindset is something individual. There are a few things however that I find work for me and if you'd like you can try them and see if it works for you too.

- Staying truly positive. This also means no complaining, although constructive criticism is sometimes in order! Complaining brings your energy down, focusing on negative things and usually making others do it too.

- Eyes on the prize. All the little stupid or painful or hard things that happen throughout the day are just little obstacles or distractions. They're so small it's really nothing. Solve them if you can. Let them go, it's not worth your time or energy. Keep your eyes on the goal at all times!

- Tap into the infinity within. Ok, this one might sound like spiritual humbug to some, but I find that I can achieve and even stretch past my limits if I use an affirmation that "unlocks" my infinite resources. One of my favorite sentances to bring me into the moment and gain immediate strength is

I'm more than human, 

I'm an infinate being of power &

anything is possible.

- Make it a game.  This is the secret I wanted to share yesterday. It won't be a secret anymore, but it's too good to keep for myself. Be the change you want to see in the world, right Mahatma Gandhi?

So you have a challenging task before you. It could be anything from paying bills, to responding to emails or just something quite repetative which for a creative person like me... isn't that motivating. I found a way to love basically doing anything. Let me tell you about yesteday when I tried it out for real...

So as some of you might know I'm working as a "cleaning lady" at a hotel at the moment. It's a tough job because you have to make it look perfect. I can do perfect, I love it, but when time is limited... That's difficult for me. The two previous days of working 5am to 4pm I had been so tired after work I just thought I was going to die on the third, but on the third I decided I was going to win.

What, there's A CLEANING LADY GAME? Yes, in my head. The good thing about visualizing it as a game is that you're kind of stepping out of yourself, taking control, gaining distance towards the tasks and a good overview. I wasn't working. I was playing a game for 11 hours. 

I imagined it like this: This game is of course time based, you have to clean the rooms on a certain ammount of time, most important are the rooms which we are expecting arrival, then the rooms of the staying guests and lastly the departure rooms. Then there are some "bonus levels" which are the spa area, corridors and helping team players on their levels. You unlock the bonus levels by finishing your levels on time or beating your own high score. 

On the side of your screen there are three different bars which are energy, social and mood.

The energy is refilled when you drink water, get positive feedback and eat.

The social is when you interact with the collegues, the boss and the guests.

The mood is when things are going well.

There are more things to do than just clean the rooms. You have to make it look nice. This is when bed making technique, paper folding and arrangement comes in to the picture which allows you to earn style points. Style points are collected at the finish of each room and level when it is overviewed and valued in time, cleanliness and presentation. I always like to gather as much style points as possible, because I find they affect the energy bar as well as the mood. Then the boss comes and gives you a compliment on your speed or room presentation? Then that's more on the social and mood. Style points are also gained when all three bars are aligned at their fullest and when you smile out of joy and gratitude.

It's always a competition with yourself. Only you make the high score. If you want to play and win it's entirely up to you. Me? I'm a winner.
What's your challenge right now? What game would you be playing?

I managed to do more than I thought I could, more than my boss thought I could and beat the high score big time yesterday with two bonus levels.

Also, don't forget to reward yourself. No matter how it goes. It's actually especially important if it's not going so well. Give yourself a break from time to time. You deserve it.

Today is my day off. Ahhhh.... 

Yoga stress - is it even possible?

Yesterday evening I tried a yoga dvd class (also from the library) to get more inspiration and learn new asanas (see previous post if you don't know what that is). It was a ashtanga vinyasa class of 90 minutes. I've attended real vinyasa classes before at Ananda yoga studio in Växjö, but this one was faster and more advanced... I was experiencing... yoga stress? I was already exhausted from the work, and needed to chill out, not break out in sweat!  I kept going but the after effect wasn't worth it. Uncomfortable body and mind.

So young yogi, what did you learn?
Well, first of all, it's important to listen to your body. It's obvious, but sometimes we need to remind ourselves. What I really needed, if I would have listened, was to meditate, do a few slow asanas and just stretch out.

It's easy to get stuck in a YOGASUPERKICKAS MODE which can be activated and motivated by beautiful people standing on their heads or performing a perfect lord of the dancers. IT'S GREAT TO HAVE INSPIRATION but don't forget that it took them time to get there. Don't stress it. Yoga to prevent stress, not build it. It's like sitting down with your favorite cup of tea (or chocolate, or coffe)... relax and enjoy it the way you want it. Don't be afraid to try something new. I won't do ashtanga vinyasa session again after work as relaxation, but on a day off? Sure.
Try, try, try again!

Haha, this picture... Paint has it's limits, but the mind? You decide!

It's up to you to get yourself where you want to be.

Are you a victim of circumstance or are you the creator?

I don't have time is not an excuse not to yoga. 

You can yoga anywhere for as long as you want!

I don't have the energy is not an excuse not to yoga.

When done right, yoga will give you more energy than you "spend". 

It's time to invest in yourself.